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Why do women stay in abusive relationships? The Majority of the time women have so much fear that they cannot stand up to their husband or male friend. Other reasons may be because they are trying to stay for the kids or even may not be financially stable to just leave. Women area often tricked into loving men who has never been loved themselves. Therefore, the abuser will put fear of greater physical danger to herself and her children if they try to leave. Social isolation results in lack of support and understanding from family and friends. Women also may need the time to plan and prepare to leave. The overall problem is that women are allowing these men to stay with them even though they are not married; this is where most of all the abusing is happening.
Why do women stay in abusive relationships? The Majority of the time women have so much fear that they cannot stand up to their husband or male friend. Other reasons may be because they are trying to stay for the kids or even may not be financially stable to just leave. Women area often tricked into loving men who has never been loved themselves. Therefore, the abuser will put fear of greater physical danger to herself and her children if they try to leave. Social isolation results in lack of support and understanding from family and friends. Women also may need the time to plan and prepare to leave. The overall problem is that women are allowing these men to stay with them even though they are not married; this is where most of all the abusing is happening.2
Domestic violence is abuse committed by a spouse, a former spouse, a fiancée, a boyfriend or girlfriend. This abuse occurs between people in an intimate relationship. Domestic violence can take many forms including emotional, sexual, and physical abuse (People against Domestic Abuse). This abuse affects the lives of the victim and the children who live within the boundaries of these abusive relationships. Abusers will often use threats so that the victim cannot escape. They will stop the victim from talking to friends and family. They tend to intimidate the victim so to make her feel bad about herself. Their goal is to have control over the victim and limit them to money, friends, and family. Different signs to know that you are being abused is your thoughts and feelings or maybe if you abuser are being very controlling over you. Most victims use a cycle of how they are going to go about abusing someone. First, they abuse to let the victim know they are in control. Next, the abuser feels guilty and admits to the abuse but still plan to keep abusing her. He uses excuses, so the victim can feel sorry for him. The abuser tends to have normal behavior, to act like nothing is going on he makes the victim want to have fantasies so she would think he is really in love with her. Finally, he will set her up so the she will not be able to get away from him.
Domestic violence is abuse committed by a spouse, a former spouse, a fiancée, a boyfriend or girlfriend. This abuse occurs between people in an intimate relationship. Domestic violence can take many forms including emotional, sexual, and physical abuse (People against Domestic Abuse). This abuse affects the lives of the victim and the children who live within the boundaries of these abusive relationships. Abusers will often use threats so that the victim cannot escape. They will stop the victim from talking to friends and family. They tend to intimidate the victim so to make her feel bad about herself. Their goal is to have control over the victim and limit them to money, friends, and family. Different signs to know that you are being abused is your thoughts and feelings or maybe if you abuser are being very controlling over you. Most victims use a cycle of how they are going to go about abusing someone. First, they abuse to let the victim know they are in control. Next, the abuser feels guilty and admits to the abuse but still plan to keep abusing her. He uses excuses, so the victim can feel sorry for him. The abuser tends to have normal behavior, to act like nothing is going on he makes the victim want to have fantasies so she would think he is really in love with her. Finally, he will set her up so the she will not be able to get away from him.3
The relationship between men and women involved in domestic violence is extremely dependent. Despite the mutual dependence women often feel they have some control over the situation. Abused women and children will remain at risk because the woman believes she needs the resources of person who is battering them to survive in the world. Although women do need their abuser until the they can provide for themselves after the abuse. Often times men cry and beg for forgiveness the next day, and swear that it will never happen again. But their intensions are not to hurt the woman, even though they end up doing it again. If the woman still loves him, she will hope that it is true and stay, but she is only making the abuse worse. Sadly, men can’t change their actions most of the time because they have been in a situation like this before, or they have witness some of these abuses in their own home.
The relationship between men and women involved in domestic violence is extremely dependent. Despite the mutual dependence women often feel they have some control over the situation. Abused women and children will remain at risk because the woman believes she needs the resources of person who is battering them to survive in the world. Although women do need their abuser until the they can provide for themselves after the abuse. Often times men cry and beg for forgiveness the next day, and swear that it will never happen again. But their intensions are not to hurt the woman, even though they end up doing it again. If the woman still loves him, she will hope that it is true and stay, but she is only making the abuse worse. Sadly, men can’t change their actions most of the time because they have been in a situation like this before, or they have witness some of these abuses in their own home.4
The violence towards the women affects the children in a home in various ways. Children in homes where domestic violence occurs may experience language problems, stress-related physical ailments, and hearing and speech problems. Many children in homes where domestic violence occurs have difficulties in school with concentration, poor academic performance, difficulty with peer interactions, and more absences from school. Children will become nonverbal and have regressed behavior such as whining. In a house like this children will receive indirectly injuries, simply because they may try to defend their mother. “We seem to care little about what it means to a child to lose a home or have stressed-out parents,” Mintz says in The New York Times. People never really think about how the kids feel when they are in a situation where they have to see their moms being abused in a harmful way by a man. This tends to make the child depressed often because they have to come home to the abuse every day. Children should not be afraid to go and tell someone about this, so that can get some type of help; sometimes the men tend to threaten the child if he or she speaks about what’s going on in the house.
The violence towards the women affects the children in a home in various ways. Children in homes where domestic violence occurs may experience language problems, stress-related physical ailments, and hearing and speech problems. Many children in homes where domestic violence occurs have difficulties in school with concentration, poor academic performance, difficulty with peer interactions, and more absences from school. Children will become nonverbal and have regressed behavior such as whining. In a house like this children will receive indirectly injuries, simply because they may try to defend their mother. “We seem to care little about what it means to a child to lose a home or have stressed-out parents,” Mintz says in The New York Times. People never really think about how the kids feel when they are in a situation where they have to see their moms being abused in a harmful way by a man. This tends to make the child depressed often because they have to come home to the abuse every day. Children should not be afraid to go and tell someone about this, so that can get some type of help; sometimes the men tend to threaten the child if he or she speaks about what’s going on in the house.5
When you are ready to leave the abuser the victim should not leave behind any evidence concerning the abuse. This is the victims evidence should you decide to press charges or file a restraining order. The victim should change her everyday routine. She should take a new route to work and leave home at a different time every day, so the abuser will not know where she is all the time. These changes may help prevent the victims’ abuser from stalking her. Stalking can lead up to killing sometimes, but the victim will never know that it is being done if they do not make an effort to switch up on the routes they take. Also, take all documents that are related to her identity and her kids. It is best to avoid the abuser completely. If the victim must exchange documents or personal effects, do it in broad daylight where plenty of people are around. Meaning, go have a conversation with them in a public place, so if they try to hurt the victim, she will have someone around to help. Once the victim has all of the information regarding her and the children and feels safe, it is best to speak with a person at a police station to help press charges on your abuser.
When you are ready to leave the abuser the victim should not leave behind any evidence concerning the abuse. This is the victims evidence should you decide to press charges or file a restraining order. The victim should change her everyday routine. She should take a new route to work and leave home at a different time every day, so the abuser will not know where she is all the time. These changes may help prevent the victims’ abuser from stalking her. Stalking can lead up to killing sometimes, but the victim will never know that it is being done if they do not make an effort to switch up on the routes they take. Also, take all documents that are related to her identity and her kids. It is best to avoid the abuser completely. If the victim must exchange documents or personal effects, do it in broad daylight where plenty of people are around. Meaning, go have a conversation with them in a public place, so if they try to hurt the victim, she will have someone around to help. Once the victim has all of the information regarding her and the children and feels safe, it is best to speak with a person at a police station to help press charges on your abuser. 6
Overall, women should not rush themselves in to a quick relationship with someone they cannot trust. Also, they should have a plan for when it’s time to escape. Women should never leave behind any type of information dealing with the abuse. She should arrange for someone trust worthy to keep the kids until she can get a change of address and phone numbers. Once a woman has left she should be careful who she gives her information to and talk to trusted people about the abuse or violence. This will help her not to get in the same predicament she was in once before. So always remember, Love is not love when it’s abusive.
Overall, women should not rush themselves in to a quick relationship with someone they cannot trust. Also, they should have a plan for when it’s time to escape. Women should never leave behind any type of information dealing with the abuse. She should arrange for someone trust worthy to keep the kids until she can get a change of address and phone numbers. Once a woman has left she should be careful who she gives her information to and talk to trusted people about the abuse or violence. This will help her not to get in the same predicament she was in once before. So always remember, Love is not love when it’s abusive.
Your paper is good… Why do most women feel like they need a man all the time? When leaving your abuser is it best to have official authority around so he/she want attack? You need to be a little more specific in this paragraph on how to escape your abuser.
Being a man I have to stand up for the male population. Domestic abuse is not just men abusing women, I know that you do mention that women do it but you seem to be extremly bias. With out even reading the authoers name I know the author is female. We’ve actually been learning about this in my PSY class and domestic abuse is pretty close to fifty-fifty. They use to think it was primarly men but today we are starting to understand that if women didnt do domestic abuse wouldnt female-female relationships have close to zero domestic abuse. Im like the piece. This is just a little constructive criticism.